Why is the Supreme Court the worst right now?

Banned Histories of Race in America

This week, targeting the BLM movement in typically racist fashion, the Supreme Court made it impossible to mass-protest in Texas, Louisiana and Mississippi. This week also saw the Court handing down an anti-trans decision and signaling support for January 6^th rioters. If you’re wondering why the Court is like this, for me, one particular story says it all.

Back in 2007 there was this panel discussion at a legal conference in Ottawa, Canada. The panel was talking about torture and terrorism law and referencing the early 2000s TV show 24 and its lead character. A Canadian judge said, “Thankfully, security agencies in all our countries do not subscribe to the mantra, ‘What would Jack Bauer do?’”

Also on this panel was famed asshole Justice Antonin Scalia, who replied, “Jack Bauer saved Los Angeles… He saved hundreds of thousands of lives… Are you going to convict Jack Bauer? Say that criminal law is against him? ‘You have the right to a jury trial?’ Is any jury going to convict Jack Bauer? I don’t think so.”

Actor Kiefer Sutherland portraying fictional character Jack Bauer.

So, a couple things. First, Jack Bauer did not save Los Angeles. This is largely because Jack Bauer is a fictional character who is completely made up, is not at all real and doesn’t actually exist. But, secondly, I guess Scalia was technically right because it is physically impossible for a jury to convict a fictional character.